How We Control our Impulses in order to Conform to Group Norms

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In recent times the word mortification has come to mean something akin to severe embarrassment or humiliation, but that is not what the word meant originally. In the Oxford English Dictionary (first published in 1933 and reprinted in 1961), we find the following definitions:

 

Mortify: To bring into subjection (the body, its appetites and passions) by the practice of self denial, abstinence, or bodily discipline. (p. 679).

 

Mortifying: Involving mortification or repression of natural appetites and desires. (p. 679)

In earlier times, mortification was viewed as a conscious process by which one constrained one's own behavior within certain narrowly defined limits. Individuals actively searched for ways to push away those natural inclinations which were not in keeping with group norms. In particular, people felt that they had to keep a rein on their "animal" impulses. These impulses came to be known as the seven deadly sins: pride, greed, lust, anger, gluttony, envy, and sloth. These" sins" might be seen as roughly corresponding to Freud's concept of the id.

Not surprisingly, skill at mortifying oneself was most thoroughly developed in austere religious orders. By becoming involved in large numbers of compulsively-performed rituals, members of such orders had little time for self-indulgence. Even so, the process of mortification through discipline, abstinence, and compulsive behavior was deemed to be ineffectual.  No one short of Jesus' could be that perfect. For this reason, most of these groups also had some form of confession - a ritualized self-denunciation in front of the group or its leader - to cleanse the remnants of self-seeking tendencies from the soul.

Most people nowadays are not aware of the importance of the process of mortification in everyday life. This lack of awareness is most likely due to prevailing individualistic mores. The loss of such understanding is, however, of relatively recent vintage. The Victorians in England were certainly aware of mortification, although at the turn of the century it was already the focus of some derision. It was satirized by name in no less than three Gilbert and Sullivan operettas.

In The Mikado, a character named Pooh Bah has to "mortify," not only his own pride, but his family pride. He does so, however, in order to save his own skin. It seems that in order to save his town from losing its charter (something which represents a collective need), someone has to volunteer' to satisfy the whims of the Mikado (the king) by allowing himself to be executed. Pooh Bah declines to volunteer, justifying his refusal on the grounds that it is necessary for him to refuse to indulge his family pride, which would be served by his accepting the job.

In Iolanthe, the queen of a group of fairies has to mortify her sexual attraction to a mortal man, and has a problem doing so after one of her favorite subjects has been caught marrying a mortal. This play satirized societal prohibitions against marry­ing across the rigid class lines present in the England of that day. In Princess Ida, women in a feminist school have to mortify their attraction to men in order to maintain their group identity. The mortification, as well as the group identity, dissolves when the school is infiltrated by some charming and handsome young men. 

From my point of view, the impulses that are most often mortified by today's individuals can be conceptualized as being those inc1inations of their real selves which conflict with the roles that they have been playing within their families. People have acquired these roles because the roles seem to be required in order to maintain family homeostasis. 

Here are several ways in which individuals mortify some of their own impulses. Some of the forms of mortification correspond to the psycho­analytic concept of defense mechanisms. In general, modern families and individuals have to do for themselves what was once done for them by the larger group. Where we once had group censure and political exile, we now have family invalidation and emotional cut-offs. 

In place of fire and brimstone from a preacher, individuals create their own frightening, irrational thoughts in order to scare themselves out of this or that desire. Instead of going to the confessional, they criticize themselves for their base inclinations and find ways to loathe themselves. Rather than engaging in prescribed rituals, they form their own reaction formations, compulsively acting in ways that run counter to their underlying desires. 

We have all devised ingenious ways to put ourselves down, subjugate our passions, and force ourselves to conform to collective standards or family needs.